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Karen Rile's avatar

Thank you for bringing this poet and his beautiful relationship to us. I am so moved by his courage, and his partner’s, and the intelligence that shines throughout his writing through dementia. It’s what we all dread most, and they faced with courage and art. The marbled paper is the perfect accompaniment to this essay.

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Beth Kephart's avatar

And reading your words makes me want to cry all over again. Thank you, Karen. And what writers—both of them.

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Bob Kirchman's avatar

“ To conduct oneself with kindness is as great an act—as essential, as heroic—as the writing of a poem, the winning of awards, the collection of trophies and stars.” — Sublime Truth

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Beth Kephart's avatar

A truth I keep relearning, Bob, thanks to people like Jillian. Thank you.

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Jocelyn Jane Cox's avatar

Gorgeous. As someone who has lost a loved one to memory loss, this line resonates: "He was not less than; he was changing." In my mother's case, she struggled to connect with the kindness she had before dementia set in. I think perhaps her anger was pent up and she unleashed it! Thank you for sharing this.

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Beth Kephart's avatar

Oh, Joceyln — This is a hard story, a hard something to imagine and, I’m sure, was so very — bewildering, at the very least — at the time, and in memory. I’m sorry that all of you went through this.

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Not The Enemy's avatar

The idea of a person changing instead of failing; riding above instead of below. Heart eternal with heart eternal. Brian remembered and cherished. Thank you for this, Jillian and Beth.

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Beth Kephart's avatar

all of this, Nancy. thank you.

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Diane's avatar

Thank you for sharing this. Beautiful X

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Linda Hoenigsberg's avatar

What a beautiful tribute! Those moments of transcendence are what keep us going...keep us believing that all is not lost. Beautiful marbled paper, Beth!

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Beth Kephart's avatar

Jillian has taught me so much, Linda. Thank you.

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Hiro Boga. To Be Soul, Do Soul's avatar

This is so beautiful, Beth, this tribute to your friend, to her beloved, and to the kindness that is the essence of each of us. Thank you for bringing us back to what is real, what matters, with your words, your art, your great, discerning heart. Grateful.

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Beth Kephart's avatar

And I thank you, Hiro, for always being near. Your own great, discerning heart.

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Deb Lund's avatar

💝

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Gerri George's avatar

Your words are stunning, to compare kindness to poetry. To me, loss of kindness is a lost opportunity to care, a chance to immerse fully.

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Beth Kephart's avatar

Gerri, this, itself, is glorious. Just glorious. I will always think of kindness now as an opportunity to care. Thank you.

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Nancy Jainchill's avatar

Poignant. Thank you.

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Beth Kephart's avatar

Thank you, Nancy —

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Beth Browne (she/her)'s avatar

💔

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Jax Peters Lowell's avatar

Beth, this is just gorgeous.

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Beth Kephart's avatar

Thank you, Jax. It is all Jillian’s beauty.

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Lea Page's avatar

Thank you for this. This one is going to last.

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Beth Kephart's avatar

Thank you, dear Lea.

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Marisol Muñoz-Kiehne's avatar

Dawn, dementia, dusk.

Jillian and Brian, us.

In the end, just love.

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Char Wilkins's avatar

You friend Jillian's word are the epitome of kindness, of goodness. What a blessing this woman must be in your life. She reminded me of Naomi Shihab Nye’s breath-stopping poem, Kindness, in which she says “Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore, only kindness that ties your shoes and sends you out into the day to gaze at bread,…” https://poets.org/poem/kindness

And your thought-"To see a man for his goodness above all else is to reveal the goodness of the seer."- so true. In the end, there is only kindness.

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